1. |
All I Am Died Today
02:54
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all I am died today
all I am died with you
if god's plan is a vacant mess
then I am at his feet
barking aloud a cry of torment that can't change anything
my cold dead hands couldn't keep you within my grasp
a fractured recognition
doomed to pursue me forevermore
apprehending a naïve fragment of serenity
amenity in rejecting sensibility
a tenacious volition constructed to run from the truth
sheltering my recklessness in the mangled deconstruction
of how to contend with that which I can't contain
my imagination only sees what it wants to see
my ingenuity lays barren in the face of defeat
a fantasy in which your coffin stands agape
digging your way to the surface
to console a bleeding nature
all I am died today
all I am died with you
they told me that they've never felt so close to god
they told me they felt watched
they told me they found faith amidst the chaos
but I haven't found a fucking thing
I think I'll see how far I'll sink
they told me they found heaven's calling
hiding in reflections when no one can see
you'll just have to see how far you'll sink
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2. |
King Nothing
02:36
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the sanctuary of absolution fails me
I will endure every gasp as a burden for eternity
searching for the utmost compassion in things that I've never earned
pity me for I'm without command
cowardice without a vision leads me to ignorance without a purpose
martyr me for nothing I could achieve
I'll bathe your ashes in the gold of christ to drown the misery
king nothing
will you salvage my soul when the time comes
king nothing
could I live up to your heart after you're gone
woe is me delivering a sermon based off exploited pieces of your flesh
sobbing into darkness
fabricating your consciousness just so I can sleep at night
I hope you never see what I've become
shower me in empathy for I'm without command
cowardice without a vision leads me to ignorance without a purpose
praise be with me for the things that I could not achieve
for only through my arrogance will I find peace of mind
on lifted time
king nothing
will you salvage my soul when the time comes
king nothing
could I live up to your heart after you're gone
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3. |
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allow the burden of sight to consume me
bear witness to ultimate agony
just to cherish you while you're still adhering to blood
and never let you go
bestow my fleeting nerve as a cage for tragedy
watch your soul slip through my fingertips
with apathy
grace washes over your carcass
flowers bloom in the dirt where your heart is
I felt it arise from whence it came
and hell follows your beating heart to the grave
compelled by fate I observe you
wallowing in faded clutches
bound to serve only casualty
at the expense of obligation
grace washes over your carcass
flowers bloom in the dirt where your heart is
a silhouette in a morbid frame
capturing an anxiety in unison with the ones you love
waiting for a sign from above
I felt it arise from whence it came
and hell follows your beating heart to the grave
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4. |
I Saw Life
02:58
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tread upon a deaf abyss
and tell me what you see
negligent comfort submitted to a desperate form
we can't pull you back
we can't distort what's passed
our weeps harmonize a choir in these vacant halls
gaze upon a body burned to ashes
and attempt to rehabilitate their will
we can't pull you back
we can't distort what's passed
our connected woe as charcoal
warms these idle homes
the last place I ever saw you was inside the hospital in Windsor
wiping tears off your face with the bedsheets
you said anything you could to try to get it through to me
but I still saw life in your eyes
like you never left home
and then I felt that christmas come and go
mourning as a metaphor
echoing throughout these vacant halls
wondering if you'd be proud to see the ways we've grown
but I guess I'll never know
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5. |
Greater Failure
02:58
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I am tethered to my impulse
sever my tongue
for every time I utter my hopeless laments
I taunt myself further past your archetype of mind
greater failure clots within the fibers of cotton and blood at the seams
cowering with fear that I'll never amount to a fucking thing
atrophy ingests my weakened blueprint
a life of waste
cursed to diminish glimmers of confidence through evil faced
obscured by fragility
wandering into moments I can't take back
justifying procrastination just to ease my aimless head
cowering in fear that I have wasted too much breath
screaming all my entitlements until my skin turns red
my voice trembles at the thought of growing old
improvising motions based off memories of you
but I would rather drink myself to death
than feel ashamed
of losing all the time I had
to live up to your name
hiding in wait for nothing
falling into a trance
threading needle through my eyelids so that I can witness
everything around me falling out of place
just watch it burn
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6. |
Manifest With Holy Light
02:48
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there's death within the soil
hiding from the sunshine
we'll feed our withered blood to skeletons to feel right
collecting power
just to dig you up and hold your bones
incorporating every remanent
just to build a home
let life wash over
the ground between us sings
visions of dying apparitions just to comfort me
let life wash over
oasis of disease
hallucinations of your phantom come to comfort me
no closure will ever be revealed from a monument of death
no father will ever manifest with holy light
manifest
let life wash over
the ground between us sings
visions of dying apparitions just to comfort me
let life wash over
oasis of disease
dwelling in nightmares of your phantom just to comfort me
no closure will ever be revealed from a monument of death
no father will ever manifest with holy light
no condolence will ever encompass the pain
of uncovering your ghost
no father will ever manifest with holy light
there will be no peace on earth
until the day I can hold your bones
manifest
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7. |
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we used to talk to god when we felt the weight
we'd ask him if he's still in pain
or if he made it to a better place
so we could carry him on as a metaphor
we still pull pine needles from under our skin
a soul transfixed to a void within
and there's a shadow in the dark
and I can't distinguish the features
but I still know it's you
I thought I'd love you through the pain
nurture me to live again
after storming the gates of heaven
beseech his body to a temporal shell forever
I'll tear the threads you've sewn for the hell of it
I'll hemorrhage for a worthless cause
sever the tie just to stoke the fires of loss
I'll watch your halo fade for the hell of it
I'll hemorrhage barren of faith
drown your prayers just to stoke the fires of loss
we still pull pine needles from under our skin
a soul transfixed to a void within
a shadow in the dark
that I'll never repay my debt to
I wish you knew that I thought I'd love you through the pain
I'll tear the threads you've sewn for the hell of it
I'll bleed for a worthless cause
sever the tie just to stoke the fires of loss
I thought I'd find myself within your embrace again
I thought I'd love you through the pain
I thought I'd always hold you close
with your strength unscathed
I thought I'd love you through the pain
but I just don't know how
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8. |
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carve your love into my psyche
unconditional
my substance wilts away
reconciliation waiting for a miracle
solitude festering in dark disease
I didn't know how to cope with it
so I gave up
and spent my life in fear
I didn't know how to ask for help
so I just buried myself in grief
a complexion molded by absence
terrified of moving on
longing to dedicate my heart to the things that are long gone
longing to dedicate my soul to your memory
your monitor flatlines every time I close my eyes
a constant frequency
signifying the end of times
your arms surround me like broken glass
but I'll learn to hold you tight
you pass through our bodies
every time the wind blows
you bloom in the spring with the flowers
when the garden grows back at home
living in the finer things
you're always close
I will never let you go
even though I'll never see your passion for the things you built
I'll hide from your judgement in somber fields
your arms surround me like broken glass
but I guess that that will have to be alright
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